Random Castle
by Kawaii-Chan789
Summary: Random things start happining in Organization XIII... complete with Sephiroth's evil chicken army, Demyx annoying Xaldin, and Xemnas 'secret' crack stash!


It's 10-31-06…9:37 at night…and I just got a ficcie idea from looking at the cover of a dictionary!

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Yes, you heard me right. A _dictionary cover_. See, it says in big, white letters, RANDOM HOUSE WEBSTER'S DICTONARY. So, I thought, Random House… Organization XIII… Random Castle…CHICKENS!!!! And this was born.

So yes, a part crack, part OOC, all humor Organization XIII fanfic. Meaning some chapters might be slightly or all crack/OOC, but hopefully not a lot. It all comes down to what ideas pop into my head.

But enough with the rambling! Hope you enjoy!

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Chapter 1- Sephiroth's Evil Chicken Army

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"Whadda you wanna do today?" Roxas asked in a retarded tone.

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?" Axel responded in the same way.

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"I dunno whadda you wanna do today?"

"To stop doing this!" Roxas, back to his normal voice, yelled.

"Yeah…and no more SpongeBob." Axel sighed.

Suddenly, the door slammed open. In came an out of breath Demyx. "Guys…" Pant. "Guys…" Pant. "Guess what?"

"What Demyx?" The other two asked in a monotonous unison.

"I dunno…" Demyx stood there for a minute, pondering. "We can go bug Xaldin as to what's for breakfast."

"Demyx, remember what happened last time you did that?" Roxas asked.

"Uh…no…should I?"

"You lost six fingers, and almost went emo over how you couldn't play your sitar until Xemnas finished the paper work for your new fingers."

"Oh…yeah…so, wanna go annoy Xaldin or what?"

Axel and Roxas rolled their eyes over Demyx's stupidity and followed him down to the kitchen.

-XIII-

"Xaaaaaaaaldiiiiiiiin!" Demyx started walking toward Xaldin, completely ignoring the six purple lances as they whizzed past him. Axel and Roxas found a safe corner to watch from.

"What Demyx?" Xaldin asked in the same monotonous tone Axel and Roxas had used to ask the question earlier.

"Quizzie-pooh!"

"What the fu-"

"Awwww, you said a bad word!" Demyx said in a kiddie voice.

"Axel, why is there a girl in the window?" Roxas asked.

"That's not a girl, idiot! It's Sephiroth!" Axel whacked Roxas in the head.

Silence. Splat.

Xaldin's face turned red as half an eggshell and yolk fell down his head. He wiped it off with his sleeve. "DEMYX!"

"It wasn't me, it was the chicken!" Demyx wailed as Xaldin's lances flew centimeters close to his head.

"'The chicken' my… AHHHHHHHH EVIL RABID CHICKEN!" Xaldin screamed, ran out of kitchen and down the hallway like a madman.

Sephiroth smashed though the window. "GO MY CLUCKY MINIONS!" He laughed hysterically as hundreds of chickens came pouring through the window.

"WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!?!?!?" Axel, Roxas and Demyx yelled. Demyx summoned his sitar, strummed a few notes, and a wall of water slammed into the chickens, leaving them in a daze.

-XIII-

"SUPERIOR! EVIL RABID CHICKENS! WITH RED SQUINTY EYES!" Xaldin screamed as he ran by Xemnas.

"Number III, did you find my crack stash, by any chance?" Xemnas asked with as much of an angry voice as a Nobody could muster.

"…Superior? You have a crack stash?"

"Uh...no…just screwin' with ya…"

"Oh…okay. But you might wanna run away from Sephiroth's chickens." Xaldin continued with his mad dash.

"…Denial. Number VII, remind me later to come up with a new crack hiding place."

"You mean that stash under your mattress, Sir?" Saïx asked.

"Dammit, how come everyone knows where it is?!" Xemnas mumbled.

-XIII-

"There's…too…many…" Axel gasped for breath.

"Can't…go…on…" Roxas collapsed.

"No! I will not lose to an army of chickens!" Demyx yelled. He stood back-to-back with Axel, surrounded by the demonic chickens. Roxas was sprawled out on the ground next to them.

"We don't even truly exist. We might as well fall to chickens." Axel sighed.

"Hey…do you hear a rumbling sound coming from the by the door?"

"Yeah…prob'ly more of 'em."

The door collapsed, and hundreds more of them came pouring in. But 'them' were actually rabbits! They began an all out war with the chickens.

"Awwww, bunnies!" Demyx smiled and petted one that jumped in his lap. "And they don't look like they wanna kill me!" The rabbit jumped out of his lap and began attacking a chicken.

"But who…?" Axel wondered aloud.

"Sephiroth!"

"Shoulda known…"

"Cloud!" Sephiroth yelled. "How dare you interrupt!"

"You have no reason to send your chickens against these Nobodies!"

"But it's hilarious!"

"This ends now!" Cloud ran toward Sephiroth and the sword fight began. Roxas, Axel, and Demyx just watched them in bewilderment.

"Curse you, Cloud! I will return!" Sephiroth disappeared into a dark portal. The chickens followed.

"Uh, thanks, I guess…" Roxas blinked.

"Hmph." Cloud started for the hallway, the rabbits following.

"Wait!" Demyx yelled.

"What?"

"Can I keep a bunny?"

"No."

"Pwetty pwease?"

"Fine. Take good care of it or I'll kill you." With that, Cloud left.

"Yaaaaaaaaay!" Demyx joyfully picked up the rabbit that had been left behind and hugged it.

"Oooooooookey…" Roxas said.

"Wanna go watch SpongeBob?" Axel asked.

"…Sure…"

-XIII-

"Luxord, what are you doing?" Xemnas asked.

"Going to Dark City to sell this stuff." Luxord pointed to the bag in his hand. "You would not believe the money I make with this!"

"Where did you get it?"

"Under your mattress."

"Dammit, how come everyone knows where my secret stash is?!?!?!?"

"Oh, that's supposed to be secret?"

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Next chapter will come when I get another idea. Hopefully soon…

Review if you wish.

-K-C out!-


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